Dear Dad

You are the youngest daughter in your family. Your father is demanding that you tell him how much you love him. In your own words, tell him what you really feel about his question. What are you prepared to say in response to his demand?

The above is a suggested blog post for the Shakespeare and Renaissance Literature unit which I am doing at University. This struck a chord with me. My own father died some 10 years ago. It is his birthday this month. I was unable to be with him in the final days of his life. He asked for us not to go down to see him. We had said our face to face goodbyes about a month earlier. I rang every day. My dad was not one to say “I Love You” and did not expect his manly sons to say it either. It was just sort of understood. I could tell my mother, as could my brothers, but to show emotions in front of my father would have been seen as weakness by him.

So, now that I have done a mindfulness course; now that I am in touch with my emotions and stand unafraid to speak them. Here is a poem, that I would write for my father. Or if you like, one that Cornelia would have written to her father the King.

You held me when I was small

kept me safe from all

that scared me in the night

or gave me a fright. 

 

You held my hand on the first day of school

you brushed my hair so I looked real cool

you put food on the table, a roof over my head

you shook my hand when you sent me to bed.

 

You carried me from the car, asleep

you taught me life lessons which I keep

you cheered while I took a bow on stage

at times you scolded me, “act you age”.

 

You gave everything that you could give

I prayed to God that you would live

It’s hard to write now as I shed a tear

we were never close but you were always near.

 

If I had the time to live over again

I would be there to share your pain

“I’m doing alright” you would lie

why did you have to go and die?

 

before I could tell you

I love you.

You see dad, its not the things you gave me that makes me love you. Its that you taught me to be a man.; to be responsible, to have my own opinion and not to follow the crowds. You taught me to be myself no matter what anyone else thinks. You made it safe for me to come out, when earlier in my life I was too afraid. When everyone else deserted me, you were there. That’s why I love you.

I miss you dad.

Dave

 

 

 

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6 Comments

Filed under Shakespeare and Renaissance Literature

6 responses to “Dear Dad

  1. Greg Kiernan

    Beautiful words Dave. Good for you.

  2. Wow Dave,
    How incredible it is to see something real, I’m so sorry for your pain. I hope that you feel liberation and catharsis after writing this poem.
    Thank you for sharing. I was deeply moved by your words.

  3. Hey Dave, I really really enjoyed your blog topic. Your emotive language really made me feel the pain and the raw emotion of how you truly felt about your dad. For that, I’d like to say thank you! It’s not easy to talk about a loved one in such a manner especially when they are no longer with us. I also enjoyed the way your poem rhymed in certain stanzas, as it made it feel more personal and unique in my opinion.
    Thanks again for such an awesome blog!
    Sara 🙂

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  5. David, I’ve chosen to review your blog this week, as it truly touched me. The fact that you unfortunately experienced the loss of one of your beloved (I cannot even begin to imagine what is it like) made your writing be very passionate and spontaneous.
    Whilst growing up our fathers are our earliest and strongest examples of masculinity and strength. Inevitably the loss of them triggers a profound grief and I can’t even comprehend how hard it would to deal with this immense sense of emptiness. You are indeed very lucky for the great relationship you had with him, and for all that you were able to learn from him- I know wholeheartedly that it has sculpted you into the person you are today…a privilege to be honest!
    Your poem, the love behind those lines, that was just amazing! I appreciated how you tackled your emotions and externalized what you have inside. I believe what you have written is special because it comes from your heart and there is nothing more sincere, true and honest than the love we feel for our loved ones.
    And as the little girl in the video ( I’ve watched it before and absolutely loved it as it makes me literally cry every time i watch it) you posted says, Dad is our Superman and forever he will be!

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